For some people, the past is a heavy burden. Between sentimental or professional disappointment and bad decisions, the past is a crucial stage for the present as for the future, but should not be an obstacle for a better life as Prem Rawat said. So if you have struggled with your past, you can rely on professional advisors like Prem Rawat or follow these 5 pieces of advice tailored for you.
The less you think about it, the better you are
The most surprising about the past is that the more we think about it, the more the feeling of guilt and regret feeds on our thoughts. We also do not recommend repression which consists of refusing the past. But, on the other hand, not to give it more importance than it has.
As a result, the less you focus on past painful experiences, the more the emotional scar closes. On the contrary, the more you think about it, the more the scar opens again.
This is not an easy step. And yet no one will be there to judge you for your ability to forgive yourself. It's actually easier to hear it. You just have to close your eyes, and see yourself mentally face to face saying to yourself: "Honestly, for this fact (name it), I forgive myself". Sincerely repeat this affirmation three times and this for at least seven days.
You will feel better and no longer think about your problem. Resilience through self-forgiveness is the most powerful form of freedom from past errors.
Become your own lawyer
When you have made a mistake and you have to defend yourself in court, you hire a lawyer. Likewise, psychology is your own lawyer. You just have to imagine defending yourself. It will be very easy for you to find "defense" arguments to alleviate your resentment towards yourself (there are always some).
Without clearance, you will see the situation from a different perspective. Advocate for yourself by putting the situation into perspective. There are always extenuating circumstances at play for you. Defend the context, the current situation, your weakness at this precise moment, your erroneous judgment. Finally, finish your judgment with leniency.
Make useful comparisons
It is useful to make comparisons with other people, who may have made mistakes which are likely to be much more serious than yours. They have managed to overcome them and better manage the situation. You will notice that other people have managed to get past this period perfectly.
Some have even managed to exploit this as a force by drawing on it a feeling of overcoming. Objectively comparing your situation to that of others who have experienced more serious situations will help you to take the necessary step back.
You are not your fault!
This is often the most important point to apply one of the rules of resilience: what happened is not you. Understand that what you feel guilty for is not your person as such, but a fact.
An error, a failure, a fault is facts and nothing else. Your person should not feel affected by this. Stay with this situation to be stored in your memory as an element external to your inner being. A fact will always remain a fact! Your person is not the fact!